Controversy

AUGUST 31, 2021

1:23pm

Well, Happy Tuesday!

It actually feels kinda blah. 😒

I haven’t really felt like being on social media.

I would blame it all on 🤕surgery 🛌 but that would be a cop out. There’s no point.

The truth is that I get like that. People follow me on social media and I honestly have no fucking idea as to why. Lol. I don’t say shit. I mean when I do it’s usually along the lines of a compliment. I do try to find the bright side of nearly everything. If I didn’t I would look at the world through the “ we’re all totally fucked lens” … No seriously.

Look at all the shit 💩that piles up everyday.

No wonder everyone’s on this “SAVE YOUR MENTAL HEALTH” kick. People are seriously losing their shit. Anyway, where was I?

Oh yeah avoiding social media.

I’m actually pretty private so even this whole open 📔 diary thing is a huge step for me. It’s kinda strange because I’m not usually shy once I begin opening up. It’s the getting there part. Even that’s strange. I don’t worry too much about what other people think of me so I know that’s not the reason. I suppose there is this feeling of detachment from society. Which is also strange because I care so much.

I mean I really CARE. 💕

I could literally spend hours in my own head trying to make sense of everything around me. Operative word is could but I don’t because I got shit to do. I wonder how my need to understand everything around me brings me to a state of social detachment? That’s the shit I’m currently trying to figure out. 🤔

I’m not that chick surrounded by all kinds of crazy fun or annoying but loyal friends. I’m not the social lite that gets invited to all the trendy parties. Nope. Not me at all. I’m the reliable one. I’m the one people call when they need advice or someone to listen. I’m the one that people think of when they need someone to get them out a tight spot but not the one they invite over for dinner or a weekend hangout. I’m the one that people love but can’t stand even though I’m the first one they would call if they were knee deep in shit. 💩 Yep, that’s me. I’m The One.

Don’t get me wrong. This is far from a pity party. When I try to feel it, I don’t feel shit. My mind some how tries to unscramble what is now a 🧩 puzzle. I don’t get it. I do wonder why am I that person? 🤔When did I become that person? Oh well. It goes in the FUCK It BUCKET 🪣 in my mind like everything else I haven’t figured out yet. Do you have a fuck it bucket too?

I predict 🔮

If we don’t get blown up by the Taliban, drown in the 🌊floods, burnt up by 🔥wildfires, starved out by the lack of movement of sitting food in the supply chain, die of thirst from water shortages and extreme drought or get our brains 🧠

scrambled by 5G and our lungs 🫁 eatin out by COVID we’ll just keep living until we die. We’ll live long enough today to hopefully figure out all the shit we need to by tomorrow. See there’s that bright side 😂🙃😆🤣😂

There’s always a bright side

Peace

XO- Nico